A time of grief

Grief is a horrible thing for anyone to have to go through.  My sister became a widow six months ago.  This week has been like it just happened for her.  She is in a deep depression and it breaks my heart.  I wish I could make her better.  I wish she didn't have to raise two children alone.  I wish her husband was by her side.  I don't understand why God took him so suddenly, but I do know that God is sovereign and just.  I know good things will come out of this.  I have never lost my spouse, but I do know grief.

     My infertility at times completely sweeps me off my feet.  I will be fine for months, enjoying raising my wonderful adopted children and then suddenly I will attend a baby shower or even hear of a family member being pregnant and suddenly I am back in that dark place of inadequacy.  It hits me right in the gut.  I find myself slipping back into that place of rage, bitterness and heartbreak.  Pleading with God to please heal my body so I can conceive.  God is so good.  He hears my heart, understands my pain and lovingly guides me back to Him.  I love Him so!  Psalms 30:5 says For his anger endureth but a moment: in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning.

In my weakness, He is my rock!  Hallelujah!


As I am traveling on this THM way, I am loving the food I am eating!  I am still trying to get through the book and as I come across a recipe, I try it.  It's been fun so far and I can't wait until my glucomannan comes in and the other things I ordered.  I will be excited to see that amazon box after Christmas.  Here are some dishes I have made so far.

This is chicken fajitas without any shells.  I just sauteed onions and peppers in coconut oil and then removed them, added a chicken breast cut into thin strips and put some homemade taco seasoning on after it had cooked.  I added the peppers and onions back to coat them with seasoning.  I deglazed the pan with a little heavy cream and cheese to make a cheesy sauce which I poured over the chicken and veggies.  It was so delicious!  And very filling.

I made the fooled ya pizza and it was wonderful! My family gobbled it up in ten minutes. They wanted to know when I was going to make it again.

I made the trim healthy pancakes with 0% Greek yogurt and blueberries that I heated until warm and poured them with the juice over it all! I was in heaven!!! I'm loving this book more and more every day.

Some thoughts

So today and yesterday I did pretty good with my eating plan.  Except for this evening. 

Yesterday
B- muffin in a mug (this was surprisingly good and easy and quick, all things I like in the morning :)

L- salmon cakes made with whole oats ( I just tweaked a recipe that I had and made it S friendly with very few carbs.  I fried them in organic palm shortening and they were delicious

D- At church last night it was pinto beans and cornbread night so I filled up first with two bowls of turnip greens and had a small bowl of pinto beans making this an E meal


Today's meal:

B- muffin in a mug ( I rarely make the same thing two days in a row, but again, it was easy and quick and very filling)  This was an S meal

L- I ate lunch out as we were finishing up shopping and had a gyro sandwich without the pita, and a huge salad with lots of creamy dressing.  It was delicious and i was so satisfied, so it's an S meal.

Now dinner was another matter.  I totally was not prepared to still be in town and having to eat out for dinner too.  So it ended up being a cheap quick meal at Sonic.  I ordered a double cheeseburger and removed the bun.  It was ok and filling, but I ate a half a container or french fries before I even knew what I was doing!  UGH!  I am still trying to get through the book and know that potatoes are a no, no but old habits are hard to break.  Hopefully I didn't do too much damage.  It's still a new learning process for me.

Sugar Detox stinks!

As I am reading my THM book and trying out new recipes, I am also detoxing off of sugar.  It is HARD! I want a stinking doughnut, sweet tea, anything!  Yesterday, my husband left part of his lunch at home.  I had made a homemade chocolate cake with butter cream chocolate icing on Monday for my nephew's birthday.  I had some batter left over and made these cute little cupcakes for my dh's lunch.  Wouldn't you know, he left them at home on the morning I decide to plunge straight into the THM lifestyle.  UGH!  Satan was trying to throw me a big curve ball!

Well guess what?  I WON!  I did not have any of those cupcakes.  Instead I ate some leftover meatloaf for breakfast (can you tell I need groceries!).  It was satisfying and I managed to ignore them for the rest of the day.  VICTORY!!! 

For supper I had a yummy  Satisfying meal.  I sauteed onions in butter until caramelized, added mushrooms and cooked them down, added a little bit of chicken stock and finished it off with heavy cream.  I had grilled some deer burgers and poured this over the top of mine.  Oh my, so good!  I had made my family Parmesan potatoes and we all had steamed broccoli tossed with butter and Parmesan.  It was a yummy S meal and I loved every bite!

Now just to get over the sugar blahs :)

I'm resurrecting this blog!

It's been way too long again since I blogged.  Life gets busy!  Very, very busy.  I have a lot to say about our past year, but that will come later.  I am excited about a new book I am reading.  It's called Trim Healthy Mama by Seren Allison and Pearle Bartlett.  They are sisters, homeschooling moms and I absolutely am loving their book.  It is teaching me so much about health and nutrition.  I have ready so many books over the years and have a fairly decent knowledge about what is healthy and what is not.  The thing I love about this book is that it is finally putting all the pieces together for me that I have been collecting for years.  I finally have hope that I can eat this way and (gasp!) lose weight too!  It's an exciting time for me.  I will blog about my journey to discover new recipes, meal ideas and weight loss.  I'm ready to reclaim my health and it's a good feeling!